Girls
of Cal State Long Beach
The spring season is upon us, and while all
the ugly endeavors of mankind continue afflicting
our lives, this time of the year should remind
us of the more beautiful things in life. In
this sense, what better way to start a discourse
on the nature of aesthetics than by asking
a simple question: “Who signifies beauty?”
The male figure, well, doesn’t signify beauty;
at best, he is handsome, a concept that is
not quite as transcendent as beauty. Beauty,
without a doubt, is embodied by the female
figure, the incredible creation of nature
and the essence of life, as we know it. Not
only does she represent beauty, but the female
figure also represents the emotional, caring
side of a species that has gone awry — thanks
to the egotistical male!
Furthermore, what represents the beauty of
woman more accurately than, yes, the girls
of Cal State Long Beach? We, young men, take
pleasure in being a member of this university,
not only for the education but also for its
gorgeous girl population — both in terms of
quality and quantity.
Our girls are not only smart — and help us
out with our academic struggles — but they
also elevate our most inner desires, causing
us to think, from time to time, that we may
be in heaven. And we, as young males, cannot
possibly conceive that such incredible beings
as the girls of CSULB can possibly exist,
at least in reality.
Example: My friend Daniel likes to go to the
University Library quite often; he may sometimes
spend hours in there, which would make me
envy his hard work and dedication to academics.
The other day, when I saw Dan studying in
the library, I finally had to ask him, “Why
do you like this place [meaning the library]
so much?” Dan’s answer was short and decisive,
“Because I enjoy watching these beautiful
girls [pointing out with his finger] study
in peace.”
I still envy Daniel’s dedication to hard work,
but now for wrong purposes.
The beautiful girls on this campus not only
put guys in a state of outmost euphoric delusion,
but they are ironically the origin of our
academic struggles. Wild weekend parties,
on and off campus, end up being the worst
— or should I say, the best — study spoiler
for any guy.
At the same time, being a resident assistant
in residence halls can be the most pleasing,
captivating, engaging, amusing, entertaining
— I’m running out of words here — thing for
any guy. Just imagine the feeling of helping
so many sweet girls who all live in your building?
This is simply a mind-blowing experience,
one that will destroy the work ethic of any,
even the most humble, guy in the world — and
I am a living proof of this.
Girls are also the reason that guys postpone
their graduation by, at least, a few years
— in average, male students graduate in 6
years. Why — because the desire to be among
so many beautiful girls instinctually induces
them to do so. Yet guys aren’t sorrowful but,
in fact, happy for their hesitation.
As a senior nearing graduation, I sometimes
feel down for I cannot accept the fact that,
by receiving my diploma, I will need to let
go of my relationship with wonderful college
girls. Maybe I should fail a few classes this
semester.
Another reason that we, as young males, love
this school is, simply put: Out of diversity
arises more beauty! This statement, I believe,
needs no further explanation. Our campus is
home to pretty girls of any and all backgrounds.
I mean, we got Caucasian flavor, we got Asian
flavor; we got African-American flavor, we
got European flavor. Of course, let us not
forget the mysterious Middle Eastern and Mediterranean
girls. Okay, let me stop here; I’m starting
to get dizzy now.
I, however, want to clarify two things. First
of all, I’m not a womanizer; I love being
a guy, for the fact that I admire girls (I
hope all the guys are nodding their heads
right now). Secondly, today’s piece is intended
to be satirical and humorous, one of those
lighter pieces that aren’t to be taken too
seriously. I am not trying to make a social,
political or philosophical stance here, but
I am simply sharing my admiration for girls
— period.
In conclusion, on behalf of all the guys,
I’d like to dedicate today’s column to all
the girls on our campus. “I love girls, girls,
girls, girls,” raps Jay-z. “Girls, I do adore.”
Indeed, we adore the girls of Cal State Long
Beach. We love you, girls!
Barlas F. Esin is a journalism major at
Cal State Long Beach. He can be reached atbesin@csulb.edu.
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