Negative
self-talk: self-defeat
Danielle
Sawyer
Rhythms
for Womyn
I
apologize for my absence but have felt inadequate
to speak on women's issues for a variety
of reasons. The first and probably most
convincing to me over the past couple of
weeks pertains to my skin color. Yes, you
guessed correctly, I am white. To be a white
western feminist speaking on the issues
of women to me most recently felt similar
to a person of color speaking about how
colonization does not affect their life
in any form. This new wave of intensity
and inadequacy had taken over my mind to
the point of giving up the column, but overwhelming
feelings of guilt made me think a little
deeper.
Not
only was I giving up a spectacular opportunity
for women's issues to be printed in the
On-line Forty-Niner, but I also felt as
though I was letting down a larger population
of people, those who not only need to be
enlightened but also educated as well about
the different sides of feminism. I am an
example of what many people do when given
information about something they disagree
with or simply cannot understand. We dismiss
it, degrade it, ignore it and move on with
our individual life.
This
is what I did for two weeks while at the
same time having that gut feeling that I
was being a coward. Can't we see that this
is exactly why we are all in the same place,
stagnantly talking about the same crap?
Stop
the monotony, pull your eyes away from the
television, stop overspending and start
asking questions, not the same questions
but new questions that challenge everything
you already know, everything you already
believe and everything presented to you.
As a white western feminist who is ready
to be decolonized and is willing to search
it out herself instead of waiting for someone
to enlighten me, I urge you to do the same.
Danielle
Sawyer is a women's studies major at Cal
State Long Beach.
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