Girls
who use men for free lunch justified
Safiya
Elkhaldy
Please
take a moment to picture this sleep over
I recently attended. About 20 college girls
have their sleeping bags and are crammed
into a small Long Beach second floor apartment.
We are all wearing our favorite little silk
bottom shorts and bubble-gum color tank
tops. And we each have a red cup on their
head.
Why?
Because we are playing the famous sleep
over game, "Have you ever?" This
game is a tradition and sacred to all sleepovers.
The rules are simple. A girl asks a question
like, "Have you ever had romantic thoughts
about a teacher," and if you have,
you put the cup on your head and the whole
room can see who has or hasn't.
As
a veteran to this game I have heard every
question asked in the history of slumber
parties. But on this particular night my
friend Leigh asked the question that no
one wants to answer. Leigh stood up and
asked, "Have you ever gone on a date
with a guy for free dinner?"
The
giddy room turned silent. We all looked
up to see who would put the red cup on their
head. I reluctantly put my cup on my head,
and then slowly all the other red cups went
up. We were all guilty. We had all sold
our souls on a weekend night for a free
meal.
"But
it wasn't any old fast food combo meal,"
my friend Kate tried to reason. "It
was pecan crusted halibut at King's Fish
house." But it didn't matter if it
was creme brulee from The Cannery, or even
Spagos in Beverly Hills, we all sat there
with our scarlet cheeks to match our cups
now.
It's
embarrassing to admit that you dressed up,
let your date pick you up, conversed and
laughed at his jokes, all in the name of
free dinner.
On
the flip side, most guys have motives too.
When discussing my sleepover with my friend
Joe, he admitted that he doesn't completely
blame the opposite sex.
"Guys
allow girls to take advantage of them. I
sleep with a girl first then I take her
out for dinner."
For
obvious reasons I don't completely agree
with Joe, but I do agree that both parties
are to blame. It's a huge game that girls
and guys like to play with one another.
But the important thing to look at is who
is winning the game. If you are a young
guy reading this, and you forked out $200
on Long Islands and filet mignon at the
Charthouse on a first date, here is your
get out of jail free card. Not only re you
losing at the dating game, you could become
the topic of a sleepover game.
Although
I am not an advocate of Joe's solution,
I do feel guys ask to be taken advantage
of. An expensive meal is not going to make
her more or less interested in you. In fact,
women tend to lose interest in guys that
try to buy their attention. The reality
of our slumber party is that both girls
and guys have hidden motives when dating.
It just depends on what participants will
get what they want while playing the dating
game. That night all of the girls had red
cups on their heads, but they still had
money in their wallets and were laughing
on a full stomach.
Safiya
Elkhaldy is a journalism student at
Cal State Long Beach.
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