Why
fall season beats all others
Put away your sunglasses because fall is
here and I couldn’t be any more excited.
Numerous reasons make this the best time
of year and without further ado, I’ll explain
why.
First, fall is the only time Southern California
experiences a significant change in weather.
Don’t get me wrong, I love summer, but nothing
compares to the slight temperature drop.
For a few months of the year, pasty people
like me can take pride in not living at
the beach. Yes, I live in Los Angeles, but
no, I do not own sandals. I can put away
the two pairs of shorts I own and bust out
my extensive Dickies collection, not to
mention my many fine sweatshirts and beanies.
I also have a long-sleeve shirt with a label
that says “The Dude” on it and it rules.
I can’t wear “The Dude” most of the year,
but during fall people who sit next to me
are going to get to know “The Dude” very,
very well.
Second, the time change occurs during the
fall. An earlier setting sun means more
darkness for night owls such as myself.
And more nighttime means more time to run
amuck, which can never be a bad thing. The
time change also contributes to fall’s aura.
I can’t put my finger on what makes fall
so special, but whatever it is, it’s powerful.
Third reason fall rules: Sports. Football
is hitting stride, basketball is starting
and baseball is ending. God, baseball is
boring, isn’t it? In a perfect world they’d
strike forever. The Lakers are going for
four in a row and for the first time ever,
the Clippers are a contender. They could
actually be good this season, and not just
“praying for a .500 record” good, but good
good.
The fourth and final major reason fall beats
all other seasons: Halloween. Finally that
one day of the year comes when heathens
like me are allowed to be who we truly are.
For 364 days a year, religious zealots tell
me I’m going to hell for whatever cockamamie
reason they can think of. But on Halloween
the ball’s in my court and I’m punishing
the other team.
I usually don’t go to Knott’s Berry but
I do visit their annual Halloween Haunt.
The park really steps it up a notch during
October and other parks have followed Knotts’
lead and done the same. Finally, amusement
parks that amuse me.
Halloween stores are already in business
and I went to one a week ago. Even I admit
a Halloween store in early September is
a bit premature, but my mom goes to things
called Christmas in July, so anything’s
possible. I have no idea what I’m going
to be this year, so if anyone has any ideas,
please let me know. Last year I was a Mormon.
I’m thinking Jesus this year but I know
I can do better.
A few other reasons make this time of year
special for me. My birthday is in November,
along with me and my girlfriend’s anniversary.
Thanksgiving is also during fall and my
grandma can out-cook yours any day of the
week, especially when it comes to pumpkin
pie. I mean it; she’ll destroy your grandma’s
pie and she makes a mean batch of shortbread.
I wish I could get her to cook me some tofurkey,
but I’m not holding my breath.
This fall also means graduation is right
around the corner. Sure, students don’t
walk in December, but so what? I’m done,
you’re not, na-na-na-na-na-na. And since
we’re talking about December, we can’t leave
out Christmas. I’ve been told it’s someone’s
birthday, but I’m not sure whose. What I
do know is I better be getting a killer
bicycle this year or I’m going to be bummed.
Even if I don’t get a new set of wheels,
I can still get drunk beyond belief at home
with my family and get away with it. With
my family, it’s not Christmas without Corona.
I believe my argument for fall being the
best season is foolproof. After reading
this, no one will be able to deny the powers
of fall. If you disagree, you’re wrong.
Ryan Ritchie is a senior journalism major
at Cal State Long Beach.
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